"You're not the only one who coulda said something," Steve points out. He can't stand Bucky blaming himself for anything and never could. The guy hung the moon in Steve's eyes from the moment they'd met; he couldn't accept him putting himself down when Steve could put it on himself instead. "I'm supposed to be brave, right? Supposed to be the one who takes the risks and all. I coulda told you something. Coulda said how I felt. 'Specially when you got shipped out and that mighta been the last time I saw you..."
Steve's quiet for a moment, his own eyes drinking in Bucky from the new, close distance. Having full color vision for the first time has allowed him to really see the depths of Bucky's eyes. It's let him appreciate the hues of his hair and the gentle way his cheeks go ruddy with drink. Steve has no idea how he survived so many years without it now that he can take it for granted. And he'll never forget the first time he got to see it.
"I was so scared," he confesses quietly in the warm air between them. "And then... When they told me you were one of the men missing... When they said they were makin' your letter to send home to your ma and sisters..." His voice cracks on that last word and he has to close his eyes a moment just to rally back.
"I woulda done anything to save you. Anything. Far as I see it, all the months of being their performing monkey was worth it just so I could bust you outta that shithole and bring you back." His fingers trail over Bucky's jaw, go up to his hairline, migrate back down and over the pulse in his neck. Steve can't find enough places to touch. "Seeing you on that table was the best moment of my life just because I could hear you talkin' and knew you were alive. Got to see you in full color for the first time. Got to see you smiling up at me...hear my name in both ears from your lips."
Steve has held on about as long as he could. He holds Bucky around the back of his neck, thumb brushing small circles under his ear before pulling him in for a kiss. It's a desperate one. The one Steve would have pressed against his mouth right there in Azzano if he'd known it would be returned. His eyes are bright as he pulls away from that moment and back into the room with Bucky in his arms. He smiles weakly but with true joy behind it.
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Steve's quiet for a moment, his own eyes drinking in Bucky from the new, close distance. Having full color vision for the first time has allowed him to really see the depths of Bucky's eyes. It's let him appreciate the hues of his hair and the gentle way his cheeks go ruddy with drink. Steve has no idea how he survived so many years without it now that he can take it for granted. And he'll never forget the first time he got to see it.
"I was so scared," he confesses quietly in the warm air between them. "And then... When they told me you were one of the men missing... When they said they were makin' your letter to send home to your ma and sisters..." His voice cracks on that last word and he has to close his eyes a moment just to rally back.
"I woulda done anything to save you. Anything. Far as I see it, all the months of being their performing monkey was worth it just so I could bust you outta that shithole and bring you back." His fingers trail over Bucky's jaw, go up to his hairline, migrate back down and over the pulse in his neck. Steve can't find enough places to touch. "Seeing you on that table was the best moment of my life just because I could hear you talkin' and knew you were alive. Got to see you in full color for the first time. Got to see you smiling up at me...hear my name in both ears from your lips."
Steve has held on about as long as he could. He holds Bucky around the back of his neck, thumb brushing small circles under his ear before pulling him in for a kiss. It's a desperate one. The one Steve would have pressed against his mouth right there in Azzano if he'd known it would be returned. His eyes are bright as he pulls away from that moment and back into the room with Bucky in his arms. He smiles weakly but with true joy behind it.
"I shoulda done that then."